Brigitte Karner
“After Peter’s death, many things feel new”
May 29 marks the first anniversary of Peter Simonischek's death. Brigitte Karner was at the popular actor's side for 43 years. She spoke to the "Krone" about grief and hospice, her new start as an actress and the appreciation for her husband in his home community.
KRONE: Your husband Peter Simonischek passed away on May 29, 2023. How did you experience the year of mourning?
Brigitte Karner: I consciously worked a lot, for the radio, made a film, had a number of readings and administrative work to do. As a widow, I didn't even realize how many visits to the authorities I would have to make. I was very afraid of falling deep into the pain. 10 months after my husband's death, I took some time out and just kept quiet for two weeks. That made me feel the pain, which I consciously exposed myself to and allowed. Only then did I start rehearsing for plays.
You kept a low profile as an actress for a long time. What feelings accompany you on your comeback?
I reduced the theater to my husband, I took a very low profile as an actress, which also had to do with the children and everyday family life. It all worked out well. Now I'm alone, my sons have their own lives and so it's time to get back into theater. But it's not easy.
Do you feel like you've made a new start in your life?
Yes, a lot of things feel new. You don't forget how to act, like riding a bike. On the contrary - it's like wine, which gets better and better with time. What I have forgotten a little is how to create the space to "close off" my own world in which I can assert myself. I try to practise this every day. When you're a widow, the state of your soul also plays a part. I am lucky that the character of Sophie in the wonderful play "Der Alpenkönig und der Menschenfeind" suits me very well. (Note: premiere is on June 7 at Theater Meggenhofen).
There's a truism that says: a year after your loss, the worst is over for the mourners.
Yes, they always told me that too. As a family, we say the year is complete with Whit Monday as a comforting day when the Holy Spirit rises. That's why we consciously said goodbye again at a church service and at the grave on Pentecost. It becomes easier to live with time. I am grateful for the time and the life we had.
How do you perceive the appreciation of your late husband in his home community of Markt Hartmannsdorf?
I am grateful for the many people who constantly go to the grave, bring flowers and light candles. When I talk about Peter Simonischek, I always feel a sense of respect. I'm also proud of that, because that's how we tried to live. The epitaph was written by an employee of the market town. Raimund Ulz also looks after the "Peter Simonischek" literary fountain.
What comforted you?
The greatest consolation was that I was at his side when he died and was able to keep my promise to care for and look after my husband for as long as I had the opportunity. I had the impression that an energy of love was released in the last hours, which was also fed by the fact that we kept our promise.
You have been a hospice ambassador since 2022. Has your commitment to end-of-life care changed as a result of your experience of dying?
No. It was so confirmed in everything because my husband was able to be at home in his last days and was also allowed to leave here. That was a gift. That's why I hope that many more people find out about hospices and the possibility of being cared for at home. However, this does not mean just waiting to die. Rather, you have people around you in a critical situation who support you and know exactly how you are doing. Care can be discontinued at any time. Unfortunately, this "switch" is discussed far too little in the system. Personally, I would do a lot more. But, as is so often the case, there is not enough money to increase the number of staff at information centers.
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